Here is the third (tada!) in my “Regrettable Books A to Z™” series. For those of you new to my series, this is 100% parody. You are more than welcome to laugh, snicker and guffaw at my amateurish photoshopping and blurb writing. Bad is good. Good is bad.
C is for Chillin’ and this one is semi- “adult warning label required”.
Today I’m going for the gusto. Fair warning, this may squick some of you out, but I’m only parodying what’s already out there! Seriously!
Sometimes wrinkly but experienced beats virile but arrogant.
Linnea Matthews has never been keen on trips home. Rascal Butte, Montana was boring when she was a kid, and it’s even more boring now that she’s an adult.
When her father suffers a nearly fatal accident that leaves him wheelchair bound, Linnea has to put her dreams on hold to take care of him. A widower for ten years, Bear Matthews has no one else besides a motley assortment of buddies who couldn’t find their way around a kitchen if their lives depended on it.
What Bear and his friends, Jim, Carl, Sam, Ralph and Fox do have in common is membership in the local Bareback Riders Club. No, it’s not a club for equestrian enthusiasts but for nudists and swingers of a more “mature” persuasion. As her father’s nurse, Linnea has no choice but to accompany him to the Fifth Annual Jamboree for his inauguration as the in-coming President.
With little blue pills in ample supply, Linnea soon realizes that Daddy’s friends have quite a bit to offer a woman, and older men really are like fine wines—they only get better with age. After such a mind-blowing experience as the belle of the bare ball, will Linnea ever be able to return to her fast-paced job in the city or will she discover that sometimes life in the slow lane has its own unique pleasures?
Eww…right? Very regrettable. But look! There’s man titty! Ok, ok, perhaps old man titty doesn’t count. The look on Linnea’s face, however, is priceless.
Gracious, what do I have planned for D? Come back tomorrow and find out!
Disclaimer: “Regrettable Books A to Z™” is a completely fictional (duh!) creation for parody purposes only. I have no product beyond what you see in this post. Photos are public domain or stock photos I have purchased. This is not a commercial purpose, however, I retain any and all creative story rights in the highly unlikely event I accidentally create something that might be worth a damn.
I’m laughing so hard I can’t breathe! Man titty jokes aside, very clever. Not sure if I’d read this one though. Probably snap a photo of it in a bookstore to show my friends. X3
Nicky @ http://njmagas.wordpress.com/2014/04/03/c-is-for/
I know I wouldn’t read this one…ga-ross! Thanks for visiting and tweeting for me, Nicky. 🙂
No problem! You weren’t getting near enough comments for how entertaining your posts are! 😀
I’d probably pass on this one as well (sorry Lila!) I love the expression on the gal’s face though – it definitely sums everything up! 😉
Oh yeah, the expression on Linnea’s face is priceless. Thanks, Katy!
Thanks, Renee! Appreciate the visit and comment.
Even though this blurb is a parody of a book cover, I think it would make a zany comedy.
Thanks, Julia! Appreciate the visit and comment. 🙂
Ewwwwww, everything about this one made me cringe, and laugh!! I’m loving these! ^__^
Alex Hurst, fantasy author in Japan, participating in Blogging A-Z April Challenge.
Cringe-worthy might almost be too tame of a word to describe this one. LOL Sad to say there really are books out there like this and they sell! Better than my books! **sobs**
*sobs with you* Maybe they’re just bought because people have to read it to believe it? *endless optimism*
Oh. My. Gawd. XD
I’ve been browsing your A to Z posts, and I must say yours is the funniest blog I’ve found this year. These books, man, these books are… great. XD
Thanks, Veronica! So many blogs to visit, I appreciate your visiting mine and glad I could make you smile. 🙂
Oh my stars and garters. You are too good at this! You must know about WTFBadRomanceCovers.com, yes? It’s almost scary how much like a genuine DigitalBookSpot.com offering your parody is! I’m in the A to Z as well.
Oh yes. I think I’ve seen the WTFBadRomanceCovers site before. If not that one, then another one very similar. Very funny and the added element of being released with an actual book behind those covers makes it even more WTF’ish. Thanks for the visit and comment!
You are just a little unhinged, do you know that? Lol. Hilarious!!
**snicker, snicker** You know you’d read it, Julie! Don’t lie!