Another book for my “Regrettable Books A to Z™” series. For those of you new to my series, this is 100% parody. You are more than welcome to laugh, snicker and guffaw at my amateurish photoshopping and blurb writing. Bad is good. Good is bad.
Who doesn’t love a good captivity trope in romance novels? Throw in a little Phantom of the Opera, Beauty and the Beast and maybe 9 1/2 weeks and you have today’s Regrettable. Better yet, make it a foody story too and it’ll be full of win.
E is for Edible.
The Tagline:
Love is blind and loves chocolate.
The blurb:
Sylvie Renaud is the beauty of Paris. Men line up at her door just to kiss her hand. Being the daughter of a wealthy baron certainly doesn’t hurt either. Sylvie can have her pick of any man, but she’s going to take her time and savor the attention as long as possible.
Gerard Dubois owns Le Meilleur Chocolat. His chocolate shoppe has earned its reputation as Paris’s finest. Hideously scarred from burns received making his famous product, he keeps out of sight, preferring to work in the lonely wee hours of the night.
Gerard’s and Sylvie’s paths cross when she makes a visit to the shoppe after hours for a birthday present. Gerard only means to stop her pounding at his door so he can get back to his work. She’ll get a good look at his face and run screaming, leaving him in peace. How could he know Paris’s grande belle is blind? While Sylvie might be unable to see his face, he is enchanted by hers. One look and he’ll do anything to keep her, including kidnapping and whisking her away to his country home.
Sylvie may be a prisoner, but there is something about the velvety rich voice of her captor that enthralls her. She should be figuring out how to escape, shouldn’t be devouring the chocolates he tantalizes her with that are surely drugged. And she definitely shouldn’t be craving the man who overwhelms all of her senses but sight.
***
Disclaimer: “Regrettable Books A to Z™” is a completely fictional (duh!) creation for parody purposes only. I have no product beyond what you see in this post. Photos are public domain or stock photos I have purchased. This is not a commercial purpose, however, I retain any and all creative story rights in the highly unlikely event I accidentally create something that might be worth a damn.
My blog is currently have some plugin gremlins. If you are unable to comment, I’m so sorry. I would appreciate an email at claire@clairegillian.com if you are so inclined. If not I understand, but am working on it! The mathematical captcha may be on as I work on a solution. Again, my apologies for that as I’m not much of a captcha gal myself but this one seems one of the least heinous unless you suck at math.
Yum chocolate!
And who doesn’t like chocolate?
I’d definitely give this one a read. How can you go wrong with chocolate, right? And I can see the Broadway adaptation now, complete with chocolate-themed love songs! 😉
Oh that’s good! I’d love to sing songs about chocolate! Thanks for visiting me, Kathryn!
When I saw the title, I thought she would have been trapped in a chocolate cage or maybe dipped in chocolate to become a chocolate statue. I am going to assume one of the two things happens after she gets kidnapped anyway.
Oh, those would all be good elements if we went for some magical realism. Thanks for the visit. 🙂
Ahahah…. so bad… so, so bad. I can just imagine the chocolate maker dousing her in chocolate when he cops come looking and saying “This? No, no~ it is just my art!” 😛
Alex Hurst, fantasy author in Japan, participating in Blogging A-Z April Challenge.