Geesh, I just now realized my alphabet is off by a day! How the heck did that happen? Oh, whoops on the 8th apparently. Apologies. I’ll catch up this Sunday and be back on track next Monday.
Today I have a new installment in my “Regrettable Books A to Z™” series. For those of you new to my series, this is 100% parody. You are more than welcome to laugh, snicker and guffaw at my amateurish photoshopping and blurb writing. Bad is good. Good is bad.
M is for Mommy
No idea where this one came from. I shopped all the images together first then concocted a ridiculous story to fit second. This one had two different titles–Tempting her BFF and Babysitting Mr. Miller–before I settled on The Mommy Swap. I really liked my Babysitting Mr. Miller concept so that may be a future Regrettable. But for today, we’re spoofing Wife Swap, the reality television show.
First the tagline:
Reality IS stranger than fiction.
The blurb:
Prunella and Charles Waltham live in Greenwich Village, NY. Prunella spends most of her time shuttling their only child Zhean-Rhennaix to the finest schools in New York City–modeling lessons on Mondays, Thursdays and Saturdays, horseback riding on Tuesdays, post-cubism art lessons on Wednesdays and the Marionette Masters’ Academy on Fridays. Her world revolves around improving her daughter’s chances in the Little Miss Hissy Fit Beauty Pageant.
Delroy and June Miller and their two kids, Travis and Bessie, live in Coon Booger Hills, Arkansas. June grows the family’s food, makes their clothing and home schools both children to keep them on God’s righteous path and away from the Evil-doers in the neighboring city of Clinton, population 1000.
When the two couples agree to participate in the hit show, “Mommy Swap,” the producers are sure they have a controversial match up on their hands.
But no one expects Charles to run off with his secretary the second Prunella boards her flight to Arkansas.
No one expects June to take to stage mommery like a skeeter to a sugar-coated toddler.
No one expects the Miller kids to lock Mrs. Waltham and their father in the storm cellar for a week so they can play “Satan’s game” of Angry Birds on her iPad.
And no one expects a country bumpkin like Delroy and a trophy wife like Prunella to fall in love.
Everyone expects life to return to normal after the show ends. Everyone is wrong.
Is that show Wife Swap still on? Hmm. Any-who, this one is a formula for disaster with infidelity, bratty kids, toddler beauty pageants and a Bible thumper.
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Disclaimer: “Regrettable Books A to Z™” is a completely fictional (duh!) creation for parody purposes only. I have no product beyond what you see in this post. Photos are public domain or stock photos I have purchased. This is not a commercial purpose, however, I retain any and all creative story rights in the highly unlikely event I accidentally create something that might be worth a damn.
This made me laugh out loud! Coon Booger Hills? Too good. If only this were a real book, I would read it. Thanks for brightening my day!
Hehe…glad you enjoyed it, Lisa! Cheers!
Kekeke~ I’m giggling all over on the inside. At first I didn’t think I’d warm to the idea, but by the end, I really liked it. 😉
What? You weren’t immediately drawn in by the Little Miss Hissy Fit pageant subplot? Incroyable! LOL Thanks for visiting me, m’dear! 🙂
Thanks for giving me an excuse to chuckle so late in the night.
Damyanti, Co-host A to Z Challenge April 2014, My Latest post
Twitter: @AprilA2Z
#atozchallenge
You’re very welcome! Thank you for visiting me and commenting. There’s so many blogs to choose from, it’s overwhelming sometimes.
That girl on the cover looks so sceptical about all of this.
Maybe skeptical or maybe she’s plotting her next Angry Birds game…hmmm. 🙂 Thanks for visiting me, Lyle.
well I just started reading you so don’t know if you outdid yourself but this “book” would appeal to many readers I’ll bet. Wow love the kid’s name the tone, timing and theme fit together so very well
Thanks, Susan. Some books are a little closer to reality than others. Reality is stranger than fiction many times and far more entertaining judging from the proliferation of reality TV shows about some of the oddest things.
That is funny! Yes, the show is still on, and I’ve always thought it was a horrible idea, even if it’s just for laughs.
Gracious, I’m glad I’ve cut back enough on my TV watching to be blissfully oblivious to its continued airings. Ugh! Yes, I’ve always found it horrifying too.
Thanks for the visit, Alex. 🙂